Anyone want a Sandwich?

ThE sAnDwIch GeNeRaTion????

So what does that exactly mean? .... And Is that me?  If you were to google it this is what  you come up with:

Recently, there is a new buzz around a subset of caregivers known as the “Sandwich Generation.” These are caregivers who find themselves squeezed in between caring for younger loved ones such as children, and their elder parents or other elder family members.While the Sandwich Generation is not a new form of family caregiving, these caregivers are receiving a long overdue peaking of interest within American society.

 OOOH....!Please Dont SQUEEZE the MaMa

Currently, the typical American sandwich generation caregiver is in her mid-forties,(Give or take a few years! ) married,( 27 years) employed,( tripled employed) and cares for both her family( For Sure) and an elderly parent, usually her mother( well lets try a 93 yr old Aunt and a 83 year old father with Alzhiemers). With this said, it is important to note that there are more and more women that find themselves in a caregiving role and even squeezed  ( please not again) in between the generations.It is also important to note that there is an ever-growing segment of family and sandwich generation caregivers that live in rural communities.( you cant get more Rural then Coolidge AZ ) Unlike caregivers living in urban and industrial areas, rural caregivers may find themselves removed from readily available and professionally organized supportive services and care networks.( well we do have a Walmart! does that count?)

Ok I am convinced that is me.... But if I am a sandwich what kind?
There are days that fill me up with nothing but pure bolonga... Some days are  gooey grilled cheese... and other are just smelly tuna...

But the Cold cut truth is there are so many unanswered questions like

• How do I split my time between my children/family and my elder loved one?
• How much of my time is too much each caregiving role?
• How do I find the time for my marriage?
• How do I find the time for me?
• How do I keep the peace between my kids and my elder loved one?
• How do I find the resources that I need for my self and my loved one?
• How do I combat my feelings of isolation?
• Guilt, guilt, and more guilt for not having enough time to accomplish it all.

They say that caregiving and womanhood go hand-in-hand. We’re nurterers by nature, That is  Probably because they don’t want to do it (whoever “they” are). Women are good at it–so They should do it

 Well I am also good at cleaning the bathroom–not because we have a knack for it–it’s mostly because nobody in the house seems to even notice

 I

The truth is that what’s going on behind most front doors is that most women know caring for our loved ones–whether babies or elders–is an important job–and most of the time, only one person in the family has the strength, autonomy, and chutzpah to do it.  We’re lonely and scared, brave and exhausted. We fear we don’t know what we’re doing. We fear we’ll be found out. And there are days I would just rather clean the bathroom and sit in it all day.

True Confessions of an over Squeezed caregiver
Itry to be patient and kind but oftentimes, I  fall short. I  feel like I am trying to outrun disease and death. I feel helpless to stop pain and depression. I love the ones I care for but I worry about my own health and relationships–and I feel as if I am giving huge chunks of my own life away–and in some ways I do it willingly, but I grieve for all I have lost. I  would cry or even give up, but I don’t have the time–and  even more something deep inside me  urges me to get up and go on.

So here I sit  today  after being awake all night long with my Aunt who talked for 7 hours straight to people ( who I could not see) But she could and the were alive and real to her. Then today while she is  sleeping I am watching my 3 year old grandson, playing fighting dragons and being a punching bag, All the while trying to plan one daughters wedding, Do some work to make some money to pay for another daughters school Tuition, Answer the phone at least 6 times to answer the same question to my father since he cannot remember that he even called me today much less already asked me the same question 6 other times...... And tomorrow I will get up and do it all over again because simply put

I love them... Just Sayin